Confessions of a Mama!

Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a calling. It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in. It is what God gave you time for.

- Neil L. Anderson

Most comfortable Nelle striped Dress, perfect for spring/summer.

This quote has kept me going when I've felt like quitting. It is no secret that Motherhood is hard.

Being a mother of two, is a whole other ball game than one. Different kids brings different challenges. Here are some of my challenges and thoughts as a mother of two. 

First off, how do you give enough time and attention to both kids, while still be a supportive wife and take care of the house? I don't have the correct answer, while I like to think that I'm a superhero, I cannot always finish my to-do list every week. It is actually impossible, so I just had to accept it and move on. Do little by little without getting overwhelmed. 

We all know that newborns need our help for pretty much everything. Some newborns are more demanding than others, and I will admit that we watched a whole lot of movies that first month before I got the hang of things. I had to tell myself it was okay and to not feel bad about it.

 I expected Olivia to be the exact same baby as Noah. Noah went straight for the goods, but Olivia, at first had a little bit of a harder time to nurse. Ever since the hospital, Olivia has been a pretty good sleeper (knock on wood) while her brother had gas problems and woke up every other hour when he was younger!! Hence my permanent Gucci bags under my eyes haha. 

I was able to breastfeed Noah for a year before we weened him off, but it has been a different story with Olivia. Like I mentioned earlier, she had a hard time actually attaching when she was born. Since she was born, 2.5 weeks early, the doctor was a little bit worried she would lose weight. I swear every feeding session was 40min long, which felt like an eternity. Then, she would sleep for a long time until she was hungry again. Like most babies do, they lose weight during their hospital stay. Liv lost quite a bit, luckily not enough for her to stay in the NICU. We had an appointment two days later to make sure she was gaining weight. I made sure to pump, feed, pump and feed as much as I could. Fast forward 5 months, I got REAL bad mastitis, so bad that I was bleeding. Anyone that has had mastitis know exactly what I am talking about. I had a fever, I was hurting, uncomfortable, frustrated and scared. Every time I attempted to feed Liv, she would cry and so would I. I was heartbroken because I had to stop breastfeeding, I tried several times but it hurt too much. Guilt then crept in. I felt like a terrible mom, like I had failed her. I felt guilty for a long time, and I dreaded that question from other moms;

Why aren't you breastfeeding? Wait, I thought you were breastfeeding...what happened? Oh, you're using formula?

I must admit, that I have loved watching Ben feed her and watching them bond. My baby is getting fed, she's healthy and oh so happy. 

This is what God gave me time for. My day dreams aside, because raising children won't last forever. When I start questioning myself, they remind me that being a mother has been my #1 day dream ever since I was a young girl. 

I know that as I continue to put my children first, everything else will fall into place. Making it possible for all of my day dreams to come true in their own perfect timing.

xo

Potty training!

Potty training is so fun... said no one ever! Before I tell you all about our adventure and what we did, know that YOU guys inspired me and gave me the best tips ever. So a huge THANK YOU to all of you who reached out.

I had been pushing off this moment for so long. I secretly was hoping that one day he would just stop using his diapers (like the stories you hear from other people). That obviously didn't happen, and I knew that I'd have to tackle the potty training monster. I don't easily get pressured by others, but it is easy as a mom to compare your child with others. I am fully aware that every child is different, they develop differently and that I had to be patient. I often heard "do it when he is ready", well how do I know he's actually ready?

I was told to read the "how to potty train in 3-days". So I did, and I totally believed I could do it. 7 months ago, we tried and we failed. After one day, there were more accidents than happy potty dances, I was so frustrated and thought to myself this isn't worth it. I still sucked it up because "I'm not a quitter", so the second day was still just as awful. He didn't get it, he didn't understand that he needed to tell me, hold his pee or not pee on the floor. I was devastated at first but quickly realized that things would be okay, I would just have to change his bum for a little longer. I pushed it off, I didn't want to try again, last time was just so painful on both our ends. 

Last Thursday, Noah had other plans. He woke up and didn't want to wear his diaper, so quickly I suggested for him to use the potty (without pushing him). I also posted on Facebook for advice and a friend of mine suggested setting a timer every 15 min. Because, lets be honest who can remember what they did an hour ago? 

Day 1

I didn't change our schedule at all, except the fact that he was running around the house naked. I was so nervous he would pee all over the place. We had some big boy undies for him with his favorite characters. I told him he could only wear them if he went potty like a big boy. I gave him lots of water/apple juice and I set the timer for 15 min. I asked him if he needed to potty, sometimes he'd say yes and sometimes no but either way I would take him to the potty and he would pee every single time. When he went potty we did our potty dance (it's pretty dang awesome) and I'd give him a treat! We had 3 accidents, and I consider that a success. I was so drained at the end of the day, I was in bed asleep by 9PM :)

Day 2

As soon as he woke up, I told him we needed to take his diaper off and put his big boy pants on (because he was a big boy now). He happily agreed and we went on with our day. This time I let him wear his undies and I did not force liquid on him. I set a timer for every 30min, but I didn't force him to go on the potty if he didn't need to. He would go potty about every hour, he also would tell me "mom, potty" which is a huge improvement from our last try. We stayed inside all day, I didn't dare to go out haha and he had one accident. I also would put a diaper on for nap and bedtime. 

Day 3

We were finally at day 3, and I was SO ready to be done. He woke up and wanted his undies with Buzz Lightyear on them. He had gotten really good at holding his pee and only using the potty when he needed to, not just to get a treat haha. I tried to trust him and just let him tell me, or watch for cues (crossing his legs and bouncing up and down). He is such a boy and my anxiety levels would go up whenever he was really into doing something and I KNEW he needed to go. We didn't have any accidents and we even went to costco for 1.5h! I didn't use the timer, I checked on him every hour to see if he needed to go. At the end of this day, I couldn't believe that we actually did it. NOAH did it, he went to the potty every time and let us know. I was so proud of him.

Today is day 6, and he is fully potty trained! HOORAY! I highly recommend doing the 3 day potty training, BUT I think you should do it if your child is ready. I am no expert, heck I just did whatever y'all told me to do. I had a lot of people asking me what we did exactly, so I figured I would let you know and hopefully this will help at least one of you. I know accidents will happen, he is no perfect child, but I am one proud mommy. It took a LOT of patience and commitment, you guys encouraged me to keep going so THANK YOU. I will encourage you who's pushing this off, once you've committed DO NOT QUIT (easier said than done). It's hard, I'm not even going to pretend it was easy! If we could do it, so can you :) Also, allow yourself lots of treats because you deserve it too!

My little big boy <3