Being a mom is hard. I have always had the "if my mom can do it, I can do it" mentality. Then I became a mother and realized how stinking hard it is. I honestly wonder quite often how my mother did/does it. Growing up I never knew there was such a thing as postpartum depression, until my best friend got it after her first. Today, I have many friends that deal with this or just depression in general. To you, who's dealing with this, I say; you are not alone.
I think theres this hidden pressure on us women, that we should be able to do everything, especially in the LDS community. Sometimes theres these pressures to be perfect and to live perfect lives. A life where our kids obey, never cry, never throws tantrums and are reverent at all times. I promise this isn't reality. I promise this happens to all of us, one way or another.
My friend told me "I never wanted to admit things were hard, because I thought that made me look like a weak mother".
I hope and pray that you never feel this way. We all struggle. Being a mother is hard work.
" The joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction" - Russell M. Ballard
Do you ever find yourself feeling defeated, frustrated, tired and full of love all at the same time?? The struggle is real people. I could be pregnant for days, because I seriously LOVE it, but then we gotta raise these little humans. They all come with their own personalities, and struggles and that is the real challenge.
Don't let peoples images make you feel less of a mother. Not everyone post about their struggles, but I guarantee that they're there. Motherhood isn't always smiles and giggles, there are daily tantrums, giant tears, food battles and sharing problems. Oh and naps! Don't even get me started on when your toddler is tired but they fight it and become super duper sensitive to everything. Then later they fall asleep at 5PM and then have another battle at 8PM, because they aren't tired. I promise, you're not the only one!
Thank heavens for the brighter moments. The times when they do obey, when they randomly hug and kiss you, when they get excited about the simplest things. Those happy smiling times are there and I am convinced that they are there to keep us going each day.
3 things that keeps me sane as a stay-at-home mother.
1. My husband!
He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. He keeps me sane, he texts me all day long to make sure we are doing okay. He wants to be involved, he loves seeing pictures of our daily adventures. When he comes home, he takes his parenting right where he left off. Sometimes he doesn't even have time to change his clothes before he's on the ground wrestling with the kids. He helps me with the kids, wakes up at night without complaining, and tells me to go out and have fun. I'm beyond grateful for him and all that he does for/with us.
2. Play dates
I would die if I didn't have play dates set up each week. Plus my kids love their friends and playing at other people's houses.
3. Me-time/Girls time
I will always preach that me-time/girls time is so important. You need to take care of yourself everyday, whether it is 30 min or 3 hours! Whatever you need to fill that cup. Do something for yourself that makes you happy. Create healthy and sincere friendships that will help and uplift you. Girls that you can count on, vent to and just have the best time with.
xo